"You're making me scared!"

We had just moved to Lexington, we were in a new house, new town, new everything. Our entire family felt out of place and unsure.
My four year old daughter Faith was being naughty so I sent her to her room for a time out. She stomped up the stairs with her arms crossed and lip puckered out. I said to her as she walked up the stairs, "Faith when you change your attitude you can come out." Her lip seemed to come out even further as she heard those words come from my mouth. After a couple of minutes of her sitting in her room I hear her yell at me, "MOM YOUR MAKING ME SCARED!!!" "Your making me scared." She kept repeating this over and over. The more she said it the sadder her voice began to sound. I reassured her that as soon as she was ready to obey she could come out of her room.
But in spite of my voice trying to reassure her that I was here and she was okay, she continued to get more and more worked up. Her voice went from a defiant "I'm scared" to a heart broken "but mommy I'm really scared."
Little did Faith know that I was also wrestling with the same thoughts in my own head. Inside I was crying out "God, you are making me scared." I kept repeating these lines over and over from the moment we started our journey from Nevada to Kentucky. "I'm scared God! I'm scared." I became so caught up in telling God how scared I was that I forgot to listen to his voice. I was acting like a little girl in my room, unable to hear my fathers voice because of all the noise I was making. I figured if I yelled louder (inside of course) he would swoop in and rescue me. If I yelled "I'm scared" he would certainly rescue me without the act of first being obedient. In fact just as Faith needed to obey me and trust that I knew best, I needed to trust my heavenly father. I needed to stop yelling and be quiet. I needed to obey and just follow Him where he had led me. I felt like God had sent me to my room, a.k.a Kentucky, as a punishment rather than a way to draw me closer to his heart.
We "had" to move to Kentucky for Tim's job (residency) so it required no obedience on my part. It didn't require me to step out of the boat and trust God. I "had" to go!
But as we drove across country the more and more I was yelling, "God I'm scared." I wanted him to let me go back to the safety of Nevada. Everything that I knew there gave me the feeling of being safe; ministry, friends, mountains, the list goes on and on, but the one thing I forgot to do was listen to His voice. He was shouting to me, "Nicole, I am here, just sit quietly and obey." I needed to  be quiet and just obey. I wanted to figure everything out, finances, friends, church but all he wanted was me to be quiet and obey his voice.
Do you find yourself like a little child screaming in your head, "your making me scared?" Are you so caught up in seeing the big picture that you can't hear him telling you to put one foot in front of the other and start walking forward? Are you yelling so loud that you are continuing in the same path that time after time has taken you no where. Sit quietly, stop yelling and listen to Him tell you that it is time to come out of your room. You don't have to be scared, He hears you.

The question is.... Are you hearing Him?          

Psalm 37:7 "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him"
                                                   Psalms 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God"
                                                                Deuteronomy 5:27b "Listen and obey."

Father God, today as we go throughout our day help us to be quiet and just hear your voice. Lord if there is an area that has required obedience but we have sat back and just yelled "I'm scared" help us today take the first step of obedience by just being quiet. Help us to not be afraid to move forward out of fear. Help us to trust and obey that you know what you are doing and already have it all figured out. --Amen

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